By Katia Ibáñez

Either uncomfortable situations or those that have different outcomes than the ones we expected, can be overwhelming and can feel like a labyrinth without exit.
In previous articles we’ve explored that our fist option is to change our situation to make it more manageable. If that doesn’t work, we can choose to consciously love it.
What option do we have if we’ve already done everything within our reach to change the situation and we haven’t succeed? What option do I have when I don’t feel capable to love it consciously? What option do I have when neither of those alternatives are possible? When the change isn’t viable, and we didn’t find a way to love the situation? Very simple. Leave it.
Retire. Getting away from the situation that you can’t change nor love, is always an alternative. Might sound extreme. Maybe it is. Still, it’s an option.
If you think it through, it has all the logic in the world. You’ve already tried to change it. You’ve already tried to love it. You couldn’t change it and you don’t find a way to love it. Why would you want to stay? That’s why the next step is to leave it.
Release. Leave. Get away. Take your distance. Stopping the fight is in many cases the best way to take care of you, to mantain your peace.
When you realize that releasing is the only way to take care of yourself and your life, then don’t hesitate on taking the possibility.
How do you let go?
Letting go may have a lot of meanings. From our perspective, every way you choose to do it needs clarity and action.
Letting go doesn’t mean that you are saying the other one is toxic, letting go doesn’t mean that the situation is unacceptable, letting go doesn’t mean that what you’re letting go is bad. Letting go means to assume that you are the one that doesn’t feel capable to change or love the situation and you’re choosing to go because you love and care yourself, everyone else and the situation.
Letting go is to assume responsibility for yourself, your constructions, your choices, your necessities, your desires and take them to a place, space, context, where you feel more capable to attend them, take care of them and satisfy them.
Do you think it’s too much? Do you feel a hole while thinking on letting go of the situation? Do you feel incapable of doing it or don’t know how? Ask for help!!! There is no higher level of autonomy than recognizing that someone else is needed in order to survive.
If after all of this you don’t find a way to change the situation, there is no way you can love it and you don’t want to change it, then you have the option 3b: Suffer it!!
From our perspective there aren’t many possibilities of constructing in a situation you find uncomfortable, that you can’t change and you haven’t found a way to love. If even though you don’t want to let it go, you are choosing the option of suffering it. And its okay. Maybe we only want to invite you to realize that it is a choice, your choice.
And the same way you’re choosing to suffer, you can choose to release, change or love.
What happens if you choose to change the situation and the result seems worst? Maybe now is easier to leave it.
And if yesterday you could love it but today something changed and now you can’t? Start again. Its not the same situation, now its situation 2.0 so you’re back where you started. You can change it, love it, leave it or suffer it.
And if you chose to leave it and now you regret it? Same case. You are not in the situation you left, you are a step past that and its not the same, so then again, you reboot the options, including raising your hand ans asking to go back.
So on and on until you find a situation that gives you peace, makes you happy, you feel safe or all of the above.
Life is choosing, and how Michael Blumenstein used to say, remember that there are no good or bad decisions, there are decisions, and you can do something good with them, even change them.
We wish that this perspective accompanies you and be useful when you need it.
And remember, you can always, always, always choose again.
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